The Njoy Fun Wand: Best Beloved

How did I ever live without this toy?

A while back, I won a Fascinations giftcard from a contest on VanillaKinks’ blog. With it, I nabbed the Njoy Fun Wand and a couple little things (speaking of which, I highly recommend the Intimate Organics sensual bath bubbles and relaxing cleansing gel.) I’d wanted a metal toy for a long time, and the Fun Wand’s one-inch diameter bulb looked perfect for me. The other end, with three  graduated knobs, or “bloops” (term stolen from Epiphora), looked fun too. The bloopy end is advertised for anal use, and I hadn’t started anal play yet, but I thought it would feel good in my vagina.

The Fun Wand’s packaging is gorgeous. Pictures don’t do it justice; the cushy pink satin lining in the black vinyl-covered box is truly luxurious. Opening that box, and seeing the beautiful shiny toy inside, I felt like a kid at Christmas again. I picked the toy up and noticed that it wasn’t all that heavy, unlike its larger sisters. It’s made of solid stainless steel, so you could whack an attacker with it, but your wrist likely won’t get tired while using it as intended.

I ran off to take a bath with my Fun Wand and a waterproof vibe. With just a tiny bit of silicone lube, the Fun Wand’s nob slipped right in. I decided to be careful; I didn’t want to bruise myself with the hard metal. That resolution didn’t last long. I stopped thinking about what I was doing almost instantaneously. I even turned off my vibe and set it aside. I only wanted to feel that heavy metal on my g-spot. I came fast; I never imagined a dildo could get me off in under a minute, but it did. After a couple more orgasms, I decided to take it out and try the other end in my vagina. I had multiple orgasms while removing the toy.

The bloopy end felt nice in my vagina, but also slightly pokey. I liked the popping feeling, but soon decided I needed to turn the toy back around and put the nob inside me again. So I did. It gave me some vaginal orgasms and eventually I ended up with a g-spot orgasm so big, it exhausted me. Just from a dildo. I am someone who can have orgasm after orgasm after orgasm and keep on wanting more — K calls me an “Energizer Bunny” — but not this time. That is when I first wondered, “how did I live without this toy?”

I washed and dried my Fun Wand lovingly and put it back in its home. I used it again the next day in bed with my Ophoria Bliss #3. Just — wow. Usually I fantasize while playing with my toys, but this felt so good I actually couldn’t fantasize. Or think at all. I think these toys were made for each other and for me.

I already adored my new toy before I knew how the end with three bloops felt in my butt. When K used the Fun Wand in my rear (with plenty of lubricant), it was a revelation. Though I was relatively new to anal play, all three solid, heavy stainless steel bulbs went in easily. They create a wonderful popping sensation when thrust gently — it’s not a bit uncomfortable, just pleasurable. The bloops play inside the rear beautifully, gently stretching and stimulating with no discomfort.

K also uses the end with one knob in my vagina. It feels even better than when I use it on myself. The toy naturally curves against my g-spot with no effort at all. The only problem I have is getting him to thrust hard enough; it takes a little begging because he’s afraid to hurt me. Once he gets going, though, it’s utterly phenomenal. I don’t even want clitoral stimulation with it.

The Fun Wand is my favorite toy, both anally and vaginally. It’s totally non-porous, completely body-safe, and seriously sturdy. I love being able to throw it into a pot to boil and not worry about it — if anything, I’m more worried for the pot! Your Fun Wand will last lifetimes if cared for; you could will this toy to others after you die. It is a perfect gift. Steel is the traditional eleventh anniversary present, so the Fun Wand would be awesome for that.

I usually review using a star system, in which 4/4 is the highest rating. I can’t do that with this dildo. It is off the charts. The Fun Wand gets a stellar nursery instead:

Source: Hubblesite.org

The Fun Wand is quite possibly the perfect dildo. You can get it at most of the sex toy stores listed on my left sidebar, including Fascinations, where I got mine.